Marie Claire thinks childless people are lazy

February 29, 2008

I’m just now catching up on my magazines for the month. Usually, I read them at the gym, but between the flu and my Guitar Hero related tendinitis, I haven’t worked out in 2 weeks.

I’m on the elliptical trainer reading Marie Clarie when I read something that makes me almost fall down. It came in the cubicle coach section, where people can get advice on workplace problems.

Q:  Dear CC: When we’re on deadline, our manager often makes the work of those with young kids a higher priority so they can be the first ones to leave.  I get that juggling parenting responsibilities and work is tough, but I shouldn’t have to pick up the slack for my overextended collegues, should I?

A:  It’s not about who’s a breeder and who isn’t.  It’s about who has earned the perk – through great work, seniority, ass-kissing, or whatever your particular office values.  CC’s experience is that those with kids use the work day more efficiently than most.  Gone are the lunchtime shopping expeditions, the visits to the gym, the gabfests around the coffeepot about the meaning of last night’s “very special” episode of Big Love.  And remember, young thang, the day may come when you need your officemates to help younow and then on account of kids, a sick parent, a rehabing spouse, or those Tuesday and Thursday night MBA courses.  Here’s hoping you’ve  accrued sufficient good karma with the breeders by then.

That’s right my single brothers and sisters in the workplace, we apparently are slackers. The act of either impregnating someone or giving birth suddenly makes you work through lunch, become productive, and not talk about TV shows.

My first reaction to this is “Fuck You”. My second reaction is “Seriously, Fuck You.” 18 hours later I’m still sort of stunned by how stupid this answer is. Read the rest of this entry »


Does the Florida Senate think women are stupid?

February 29, 2008

 State Senator Dan Webster is proposing legislation that would mandate women seeking an abortion to first view an ultrasound.

I’m not looking to start a debate about abortion. Both sides on the issue have made up their minds and it’ll take a lot more than some blog to change them. I just want to make that clear at the start. This isn’t about abortion, it’s about respecting that women are capable of making their own decisions.

Women aren’t stupid. We understand that pregnancy means we have a fetus growing inside of us. It isn’t as if we don’t know what it looks like. Actually, have you seen what a fetus looks like in the first trimester (the point at which most women choose abortion). This might actually cause the abortion rate to go up! 

It isn't as cute at this stage, is it?

Seriously, look at that thing. It looks like something out of a nightmare.

Read the rest of this entry »

Carrie Bradshaw is no Mary Richards

February 29, 2008

I’ll admit that I like Sex and the City. Like most people my age, I would watch every week to see the adventures of Carrie, Samantha, Miranda and Charlotte as they tried to find love in the modern world. There were even moments when I was cheering along with the show for fighting back against the societal push towards marriage and family as signs of accomplishment. I especially loves the 6th Season episode “A Woman’s Right To Shoes” when Carrie realizes that there are no gift giving occasions for single women like there are for family women (i.e. wedding showers, baby showers, wedding anniversaries).

Carrie: So then… If I don’t get married or have a baby, what? I get Bupkiss? Think about it, after graduation there is not one event that is just about you
Charlotte: We get Birthdays
Carrie: No, no, no, we all get birthdays!

But for every “you go girl” moment along the way, the series ultimately gave us what it considered a happy ending, everyone was paired off with their soulmates and living the life of the perky togethers. We were left to believe the commitment-phobic Mr. Big had suddenly ready to settle down with Carrie. That the ultimate romantic, Charlotte, had her hubby, her dog, and was about to adopt a baby. Career woman Miranda ultimately learned that real happiness is bathing your sick mother-in-law (because all women really live to serve). Even sexually aggressive Samantha had found her one twue wove.

The message was clear – it’s okay to be single, as long as it’s a temporary conditions.

I know it sounds like I’m bashing SATC, but I’m not. They are just the symptom of a larger problem of a total lack of single female role models in pop culture.

Read the rest of this entry »

Adventures in eHarmony

February 27, 2008

“Have you tried online dating?”

A week after the break-up people started telling me how I needed to get back out there. I wasn’t so sure. The ex and I had been together for 8 years. We were in college when we started dating. Back then, all it took to meet someone was to stop by the library. I guess I assumed that dating in the real world would be as simple.

It’s not. The only people who hang out at the library are homeless or old. Not really on my list of turn-ons.

It was in the spirit of defeat that I signed up with eHarmony. 

Read the rest of this entry »

The Only Daddies I want to date are Sugar Daddies!

February 25, 2008

Undateable?Okay, that’s sort of a joke. But like most jokes there is a core of truth. Once I got back on the dating scene I was shocked by how many of the guys had kids.

Don’t get me wrong. I love kids. I want to have a few of my own at some point. I just don’t feel like I’m ready for them yet. At 28 I’m just now able to take care of myself, and I don’t even do that very well. I had corn and crackers for dinner last night! I can’t imagine having to care for another human being.

The truth is, I’m sort of intimidated by single dads.

Read the rest of this entry »

The Break-up: One Year Later

February 25, 2008

The ex dumped me on Oscar Night.

We would always watch the show together, even competing on who could predict the most winners. It was one of the cute things we’d do together that made us seem like the perfect couple.

Hell, we were the perfect couple. Seriously. We never fought. We loved spending time together. We had killer banter. If you look at pictures of us together you’ll notice people in the background laughing, because we were always so funny and adorable. I loved him more than anything else. I was pretty sure he loved me. At least, I have the letters where he said he did.

I still don’t know what happened exactly. I just know that he delivered the finishing blow during the Oscars. His reason for ending it after 8 years? “You’re not the type of girl someone marries.” Read the rest of this entry »

Five Signs You’re a Single Woman

February 22, 2008

1. While trying to hang pictures, you realize you don’t own a hammer. So, instead you end up using a pair of heels to get the job done.

2. You consider reaching “Open Communication” on eharmony as a long term relationship.

3. The Chili’s Takeout Person recognizes your voice when you call and asks if you want “the usual”.

4. You don’t understand why your co-workers let the new mother come in late after the baby kept her up all night, but they won’t let you do the same thing after your kitten decides to attack your feet at 3AM.

5. You feel guilty for cheating on your regular vibrator with the big black one. Although, not guilty enough that you get rid of it.